O Canadians how I love thee.
You send us your very best.
The second best Ghost Buster, Dan Aykroyd, is Canadian.
The second best sketch comedy show is Canadian, “I’m pinching your face!” Hail, Kids in the Hall.
The second best action-adventure based in Egypt stars Canadian Brendan Fraser.
My wife’s second favorite piece of actor man-candy is Canadian, thank you Ryan Gosling your existence is the equivalent of foreplay.
The second best 80’s Corey was Canadian, RIP Corey Haim.
The second coolest mustache on TV belonged to a Canadian, “Who is Alex Trebeck?” Damn you Tom Selleck
Finally, Canada gave the us the World’s Greatest Frankenstein. God Bless your Phil Hartman. Who can forget his dramatic interpretation of the Canadian Motto, “Fire bad.” Fire bad, indeed.
PS In all sincerity, I love Canada.
I had so many Canadian girlfriends in high school you can’t even believe it.
They were crazy hot too, so it makes sense that I have no prom pictures, or homecoming pictures, or Sadie Hawkins, MORP, Spring Fling, Winter Formal–the point is, if you had a smokin’ hot Canadian girlfriend you wouldn’t want to ruin it by going to some dumb high school dance.