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Well, I learned a new word for prostitute today. I foresee a mass overuse of this word in the very near future.

Here at Unicorn Soup, we’re all about education, particularly regarding euphemisms and double-entendres. If you know what I mean, wink wink.

Here’s a prostitute-related recipe that I’ve been tinkering with: Pasta Puttanesca (loosely translated: “Pasta like how them hoes makes it”). Quick, easy, delicious and the ingredients have a long shelf life, a lot like prostitutes, I’m told. The source for this recipe is, but I’ve adjusted it to my family’s liking.

1 pound dry spaghetti or linguine fina (aka flat spaghetti in my house)
1 tsp anchovy paste (it comes in a toothpaste tube. for reals)
3-5 cloves garlic, crushed with a press
1 to 2 tbsp olive oil
2 one-pound cans tomatoes (diced, whole, petite-cut, doesn’t matter it’s going in the blender)
1/2 cup kalamata olives, drained & pitted (put in blender with tomatoes)
1/2 tsp capers, drained (also into the blender)
1/2 to 1 tsp red pepper flakes
1 to 1-1/2 tsp dried basil (if you’ve got fresh, use a bunch, put it in just before serving)

While the pasta boils, sautee the garlic and anchovy paste in the olive oil, in a large skillet or saucepan over med-high heat. Don’t let the garlic brown! Blend the tomatoes, olives and capers together to a more or less even consistency. Pour into the saucepan, add red pepper and dried basil and stir. Bring to a boil and simmer while you wait for the pasta to cook till just before it’s al dente. Drain the pasta and stir it into the simmering sauce, allow it to cook there until it’s al dente. Plate and serve.

This is quick and delicious, and after eating it your family will be able to hide a hooded assassin in your midst with increased efficiency! So I’m told.

Let the Crumpocalypse begin!

By the by, would you guys consider running for Kotaku’s Sunday Comics section? They’re looking for new blood and putting the current strips up for vote. Javis and I will be fighting for Legacy Control’s re-election. Newcomers get a tough crowd, but maybe the increase and visibility are something ya’ll would be interested in. Thick skin required.

No matter what, Soup will always be my favorite comic (that I don’t work for).

Since we only produce one comic a week and it’s not always game related, I don’t think it’s necessarily the right arena for us. The editors wouldn’t be able to pick an appropriate comic each week, they’d be stuck with whatever we’d done. I’m all for increased exposure, but it just doesn’t seem like we’d be a good fit.

Good luck to you with Legacy Control’s reelection! I’ll be sure to get over there and vote for you guys.

What Jim meant to say was, Vote for Unicorn Soup!

I’ve got a little bit different take on Kotaku than my esteemed partner. The exposure would be tremendous for the Soup. With a larger readership comes interesting opportunities like heaps and heaps of cash. In America first you get the readers, then you get the power, then you get the women, or something like that.

Or as Homer put it…

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