As an American I only speak one language… I am aware that others exist, but I choose only to use them as seasoning. In the case of my Banana Bread, I’ve spiced it up with “de los Muertos,” I’ve always thought the phrase sounded delicious and invigorating, just like my bread. If you’re like me, you’ve got some nerd friends …
My cells are tired, and I suspect it’s my own damn fault. It’s either my fault because my genes are too stellar, or because I’m facing a karmic punishment for narcissistic shit talking. First the stellar gene theory, my son has decided that rather than sprouting one or two teeth at a time he’d prefer to have them all at …
O Canadians how I love thee. You send us your very best. The second best Ghost Buster, Dan Aykroyd, is Canadian. The second best sketch comedy show is Canadian, “I’m pinching your face!” Hail, Kids in the Hall. The second best action-adventure based in Egypt stars Canadian Brendan Fraser. My wife’s second favorite piece of actor man-candy is Canadian, thank …
Reboots have reigned in Hollywood for most of the last decade. From a business standpoint it makes sense—take a proven franchise, familiar characters, add CGI, and begin printing money. The financially beleaguered comic book industry has taken the same approach from time to time. Marvel launched its Ultimates line as a way to cast off decades of continuity and start …
Yes you can haz $4 mic! New isn’t better. The first generation Xbox 360 headsets were simple and efficient. The mute and volume controls were easily accessible. Then came the “Chat Pad” that no one bought. Most manufacturers followed Microsoft’s lead and began placing the mute and volume controls inline rather than as they were originally designed near the …
Some wounds don’t heal. Let me tell you about a little boy, his Christmas money, and more than 25 years of resentment. *Ahem* Once upon a time I got $50 for Christmas. I took it to Toys R Us and bought Rush N Attack. The game was horrible. I should have bought Bionic Commando. My brother bought Metroid. …
Jim and I started Unicorn Soup at almost the same time Baby Indy was born. This posed a problem, I needed to produce scripts but had no time. The only free time I had were those few precious minutes I’d sneak away for my shower, and most of that time would be eaten up doing my best Kevin Spacey impersonation. …
Thank God for party chat. In the Year 2000–I hung up my WoW subscription and bought an Xbox. Yes, I played Wow. I’ll pause while you snicker. There was no party chat when I got into Xbox but there were loads of DickyDoo’s. It’s a pleasant and insular time we live in, with a nice group of gaming friends I …
I’m filling in for Jack this week, as he’s having back problems that prevent him from sitting at the computer and being funny. I’d like for everyone to take a minute and think some warm, healing waves in his direction. You don’t need to know where he is, just focus them on the monitor or a convenient USB port, and …
Netflix ruined “The Highlander.” Without instant streaming I’d never have watched that embarrassment of a movie again. It’s likely I’d have wandered through the rest of my life saying things like, “Christopher Lambert kicks ass!” He very well may kick ass, but those movies don’t. If there’s a movie you loved as a child and you stumble across it. Keep …
