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The Man of Seattle

The Man of Seattle published on 1 Comment on The Man of Seattle

First and most importantly, Happy Birthday to my lovely wife. I love and adore you!

Well, everyone is sick in the Casa de Jack this week. Colds remind me what a wimp I am. Both my toddler and my wife handle being sick WAY better than I do. Usually my method for overcoming illness is a steady diet of tea and gaming. This time around the bug happened to coincide with one of the best purchases I’ve ever made the Looney Tunes Golden Collection.  What’s so great about this, other than the hundreds of hours of amazing toons is that they’re all original… so Bugs drinks, smokes, and plays Russian Roulette. I like cultural sensitivity as much as the next guy, but I do hate revising classic art in the name of modern cultural mores. The collection also includes great bonus features–like commentary by the great Chuck Jones.

For all you would be parents out there I’ve got two pro-tips for you.

  1. Buy the Looney Tunes Golden Collection–you and your kids will love it
  2. Burnt flour works wonders for diaper rash. Like amazing alchemy magic.

Time for more Bugs and tea.

Cheers,

Jack

Skills are overrated

Skills Are Overrated

Skills Are Overrated published on No Comments on Skills Are Overrated

I would love to see a game mode in Assassin’s Creed multiplayer that strips abilities from you based on your score during the round. Something along these lines:

8th and 7th places: Door’s open. Poison, smoke focus, guns, knock yourself out, the cheaper the better.

6th, 5th and 4th places: Defensive skills only. Bodyguard, morph, disguise all okay, but no poison, no smoke bombs, no guns or throwing knives. Kills require skill, but you can use your abilities to save your own skin.

3rd, 2nd and 1st places: No abilities. Your survival, and your ability to score, require you to be excellent at hiding, sneaking, and incognito kills.

I think it would be fun; like Mathilda’s training in “Leon”– amateurs get a sniper rifle, pros get a knife.

All In

All In published on 2 Comments on All In

My Valentine of more than a decade is responsible for the joke this week.

We sat in the Costco parking lot eating burritos, people watching–and trying to decide whether or not we had a Costco trip in us.  She looked over at me and said, “Baby, why does Costco demand so much commitment?  When I buy lotion do I really want to commit to a year’s worth in one purchase?  What if I want to mix it up after a few weeks?  Nope, sorry you have to use the ten gallons you already purchased.”

When you can eat burritos and enjoy a discussion about bulk goods, you know you’ve got the right Valentine.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Never Cross the Order

Never Cross the Order published on 2 Comments on Never Cross the Order

The first Dragonborn got his powers shortly after following Unicorn Soup on Facebook, Twitter, and sharing U.S. with all his friends and family. Wouldn’t you like to absorb dragon souls too?

Two guys I really like JJ Abrams and Gabe Newell announced today that they are looking to collaborate on both games and movies. We live in a brave and beautiful new world.

Certainly, it’s easy to nitpick the two creators–and preforming in nerd culture at the level that they do is sort of like being a sports star in New York City, that said I can’t wait for the collaboration. Think of it–a Valve Movie/Game crossover that blends the sci-fi genius that was the first two seasons of “Lost” with the innovative humor and storytelling of Portal…Aperture as Dharma Initiative?  A proper Half-Life movie complete with Orwellian overtones and not Shia cast as Gordon Freeman.

Or, the Holy Grail of crossovers–a Valve produced series of Star Wars games based on JJ’s up and coming Episodes VII, VIII and IX!  My friend Brian’s head has no doubt exploded somewhere in Ohio at this suggestion–but I can think of nothing better.

Think of the possibilities–Star Wars DoTA, Star Wars TF2, Star Wars Portal staring R2 and 3PO, Star Wars Left4Dead complete with Rakghoul Plague… the iterations are endless.

Thank you Universe for making these guys buddies. You have restored my faith, I guess  God really does love us nerds.

Cheers,

Jack